Troy said he didn't want to see me anymore. I think someone told him what I've been doing. I can't love him. He's a good friend and I tried, but it just felt wrong. I don't think I'll ever love anyone really. Not even Summer.

I asked Troy to not tell anyone. He said he wouldn't, but Captain Kirk was already telling everybody anyway so it'll get out eventually. Fuck everbody. Fuck my life.

Troy called again. I asked him where he heard about it and he said that Captain Kirk saw me and some dude in a car parked behind the 711. I told Troy I didn't have a choice anymore, I needed money. He said he was trying to understand, but he was scared for me. I told him not to worry about me. Why is everyone worried about me? This is my choice. Isn't it? I can take care of myself. Can't I?